I Can’t Believe They Just Did That

神コン.

They really did.

Wow.

The Lolwut Moment

Today was payday at work. A nice day. Due to the fact that I have a not minimum wage job and at least some concept of money management, it’s actually pretty irrelevant which day I get paid or how often it comes. Not living paycheck-to-paycheck is nice.*

Anyway, I open up the envelope and check the number and it is way higher than I was expecting. I was pretty sure I had barely clocked any OT during that pay period and a quick glance at my OT hours showed 2. Which was more than I thought.

I was puzzled for a second before I considered checking my pay rate. Especially due to the fact that I had just recently had a review. And there was the explanation. A 10% raise.

Very nice surprise.

Also: mayo is nasty. It’s tasteless slime. Really, slathering tasteless slime on a sandwich makes no sense at all.

Speaking of which, one of my coworkers claimed that saying mayo and Miracle Whip were the same was like saying butter and margarine are the same.

—–
*I sort of live paycheck-to-paycheck. But the way it works is that I think of my budget periods by month and not biweekly as that is how my bills work and that I try to think of my monthly earnings as all my money for the month so I can’t spend more than I earn. By dipping into my savings I’m ‘borrowing’ money. This helps reduce excessive spending by thinking of my monthly start point as being at $0 and building from there.

I also don’t really feel like a frugal person. I’m so wasteful with my money. So much unnecessary spending.

Lol, Habaneros

One of my coworkers this morning was telling me about these great baby pumpkin things. And that he had brought some along. My response: I don’t trust you.

He kept going on about how great they were and how I should ask his bro-in-law about them and they were right there. So I walk over and look at this ‘baby pumpkin’. My response: That’s a pepper.

No no. It’s great. It’s a baby pumpkin. Try it. My response: Okay. I’ll try it.

So I bite it. My raction: Dude. This is a pepper. This leads into an argument about it being a pepper and how I know (i.e. It tastes like a pepper and it looks like a pepper). Finally the bro-in-law mentions that I might want to spit it out as it’s a habanero.

I had, indeed, kept half a habanero in my mouth while arguing about whether or not it was apper.

I Think I Was Almost Arrested

So last night on my drive home from gaming–as I almost home–I see lights start going in my rear-view mirror.

I pull over instantly not thinking to check my speed (I don’t use cruise in town) before slowing. I realize that’s stupid as the cop is going to ask if I know why I got pulled over and the reason is obviously going to be speeding.

Well, two cops get out of the car and approach my car from both sides. I start feeling a little nervous as this seems very odd for a minor traffic violation.

“Do you know why you got pulled over?”
“I guess I was speeding?”
“No. Did you know the light over your license plate is out.”
“No sir.”

Then he starts asking me a bunch of questions about where I was going what I was doing and where I worked. When I got pulled over for speeding I got asked where I was going and why I was in such a rush to get there.

But for light I’d never know was out until a cop pulled me over and told me? What?

Then comes the next question: Have you ever been arrested son?

That was a real shocker. Then came “Are you under the influence?” No, I haven’t been drinking. “No marijuana or (some other drug I can’t remember)?” Uh, no.

“You seem a little nervous.”

I was tempted to say “Well duh.” But my modus operandi with police officers to to be polite, respectful, helpful, and honest.

“I’m going to ask you to step out of your car.”

I really started freaking out that. I tried to keep cool, but c’mon.

“I’m going to search you for weapon now.”

So I got to be one of those people standing on a busy street getting frisked by the cops.

“You carrying anything illegal in the car?”
“Not that I am aware of.”
“Mind if I check?”
“Go ahead.”
“Please go lean on the our car.”

So I go over to the cop car with one cop who tells me to just sit on the hood while the other cop searches my car. Oh, and I get asked the same litany of questions from this guy while he calls headquarters with out location and gives them my name and license number.

Finally the one officer finishes searching my car. He comes back they give me my license and tell me I can head home now. And to make sure I get my light fixed.

They seemed convinced I was up to no good the entire time. Even when they let me go they still looked like they still thought I was a trouble maker of sorts.

I’m still not sure if the reason I didn’t get arrested was due to the fact that they had nothing on me except that I was “extremely nervous” and had a malfunctioning light or because I was polite, respectful, helpful, and honest instead of sassy and sarcastic like I wanted to be.

Eh

I recommend watching in HQ.

Unless you aren’t interested in the wimmins. In which case there really isn’t a point to watching the video. It’s not like the song is particularly good.